Abigail's Birthday. The Fast Diet 26th January 2013

Today is Abigail's birthday.
Abigail is 23 today. I can hardly believe it.
Abigail escaped from anorexia and moved into a flat with her boyfriend, Ben and my goddaughter Ellie. She got a degree. She got a job or two and a night shift on John's paper. Abigail has a good life. I am so relieved.
Maisie stayed the night last night with Abigail so John and travel to Abigail's flat by ourselves. this is how we will travel all the time when we are old, which will happen very soon.
"What do retired people do?" asks John as we drive up Camden Road. "How do they fill their days?"
 I am pretty sure that, for me, this will not be a problem.
Ben cooks us a lovely brunch. "
It's a Polish breakfast," he tells us serving up corn fritters and spinach and handing out liberal Bloody Mary's.
We give Abigail an Ipad for her birthday. She is very happy.
"I'm on the Fast Diet."She tells us. I am very uneasy about dieting and Abigail but The Fast Diet is very good for you because physiologically we are cavemen.
"That's a very good diet." I say, "you should try it John. Physiologically we are basically cavemen and the Fast Diet is a diet where you fast for two days a week and eat normally for the other five. Cavemen probably had to fast quite a lot." I tell him.
"What do you mean?" Says John. "We have evolved massively since we lived in caves. Our hands are bigger and more dextrous. Our brains are bigger and more functional and we can work an Ipad."
"If you mean we are cleverer, I disagree." I say. "People were smaller because they were not so well nourished. Their hands were very dextrous. How dextrous do you think you would have to be to build a dry stone wall, to embroider a firescreen or to play Handel's Water Music on a piano?"
"To be fair," says Ben who is a musician. "you can't play Handel's Water Music on a piano."
"Well a harpsichord then." I say. "Pretty dextrous, I'm guessing. And as for being cleverer, our IQs have increased massively since Victorian times but as IQ tests have been proved to be little more than a test of middleclassity or modernity and, since we all agree that Darwin was quite clever even though he probably had the IQ of a watervole, I think we can discount IQ from the argument."
John looks sceptical. "What are your sources?" He asks.
That is so rude. When people ask for your sources they are just being very rude. Next time I try to express an opinion I will bring my source book with me with names and dates.
"What are your sources?" I retort. " How do you know that everyone in a cave had tiny little pointless hands?'
"Did caveman play the harpsichord?" Asks Abigail.
"Why does having bigger hands that can work an Ipad mean you shouldn't fast?" Asks Maisie.
John pours himself another Bloody Mary. "I think," he says "that you are all missing the point."